It’s funny, until recently I never really considered myself creative. However lately, it seems I’ve been discovering a new side of myself, and I’ve been “creating” left and right. Its almost like picking up the camera and deciding to actually pursue my dream of doing photography, has unlocked the door of this hidden part of me. That creativity is bleeding into other areas now. I actually made several of our Christmas presents to give away and have caught myself looking at things thinking to myself….”I could make this!”. You have to understand, this is a completely new thing for me!
I’ve contemplated this change a bit lately and it struck me when I ran across the above quote on Facebook the other day, and it sums up the conclusion I’ve come to.
It’s not that I’m NOT creative, it’s that too often my creative side has been suffocated by my fear.
You see, I’m a “follow the rules” kind of girl. Coloring outside the lines, doesn’t come easy, even on an artistic level. The idea that I have to let go of being “wrong” and follow my gut on how I think something should look has stretched me more then I can begin to even communicate. There is this fear that rattles around in my head that says…what if they don’t like it? What if they don’t approve? What if it’s “wrong”? It is these kinds of thoughts, that have stopped me dead in my tracks, in life and in my artistic endeavors way more times then I’d like to admit.
This past year though, God has been leading me on journey, to break free from fear that too often controls me or hinders me from following the path that He has for me. It seems only appropriate that He would extend His lessons to the daily part of my life and passions.
Who knew that God could use the lens of a camera to teach me to be brave? But He is.
So today I’m choosing to let go of fear, and trust that internal creative side He’s given me. I’m not going to get it right all of the time, but I’m learning to be comfortable with that. And the rest of the time…well the truth is, I’m happy with what I’ve created, and I guess that’s what matters.